Candidates Say the Darndest Things

One of the best parts of election years is watching the candidates say things that you know are going to come back and bit them in the ass.  The classic example is George Bush Sr’s famous “Read my lips: No new taxes” quote.  It’s kind of like guaranteeing a victory in the NFL playoffs or calling your shot in baseball.  If you make good on it, you look like a genius.  And if you don’t, well, you just look like an ass.

The thing about GB Sr., though, is that his promise was rather benign.  No new taxes.  Sure, that sounds good even if it isn’t really all that realistic.  And compared to what the candidates are saying this time around, well, it also sounds rather sane.

Consider Newt Gingrich’s recent promise to colonize the moon by 2020.  Now aside from the fact that there is really no good reason to establish a permanent base on the moon nor any feasible way of doing so, it also seems like maybe we should focus the immense resources needed for such a mission on infrastructure projects or the like, things with tangible benefits that can not only be shared by all citizens but also put the those same citizens to work.  Call me crazy but that’s just how I look at things.

When it comes to crazy, though, the moon base is only one of Gingrich’s many issues.  In fact, the more you look at what the guy says and does, the more you realize that he probably is legitimately mentally ill.  Megalomania, irrationality, wild mood swings.  It’s all there on the public record and in the numerous articles written about the former Speaker.

I don’t know, though.  Even though it’s terrible for the country and would turn the general election into a joke, there’s a part of me that wouldn’t mind seeing Newt get the nomination.  Who knows what other gems might be uncovered as he reaches for the highest office in the land?  More than that, at least his crazy is kind of fun.  It’s much better than the kind of crazy that says rape victims should “Make the best out of a bad situation.”  That, my friends, is truly insane.

-A

It’s My Party and I’ll Gloat If I Want To

Only a few weeks remain before pitchers and catchers report to spring training, which means we’re that much closer to the 2012 baseball season beginning with the St. Louis Cardinals reigning as CHAMPIONS OF THE UNIVERSE!!!

Hot dog! What more could a Fredbird fanatic like myself ask for on his birthday?

How about a decent bullpen?

*POOF*

And there it is: a beautiful, beautiful bullpen! Fernando Salas, Lance Lynn, Scrabble. And Motte to close?!?! Wow!

I have to go back many years (at the height of Izzy-mania to be exact) to remember going into spring training sans a bullpen worry (or nightmare). Having a closer whose calling card is missing bats is just the exclamation point!!!

And now for something completely different:

Happy Friday!

Jeff

Mr. Lung, Superstar

I’m a day early but these things are rarely exact.  No one really knows for sure if Jesus was born 2,012 years ago, for instance.  But I can tell you for sure that Jeff was born 33 years ago as of tomorrow.  I just hope that Jeff doesn’t decide to follow in Jesus’ footsteps.  See, [...] Read more »

For Your Viewing Pleasure

Yorvit Torrealba tells an ump what he really thinks: My question:  So, why did you swing? -A Bookmark It Hide Sites Read more »

Best Picture

THIS has the potential to knock Field of Dreams from its perch. Don’t hate me. ‘Cuz I’m right. Peace Jeff Bookmark It Hide Sites Read more »

Tiger Blood

The coke-binged, wiry meme used as today’s title may not have the same ring to it as it did WAY back in 2011, but if you’re a fan of the Detroit variety, you know that Tiger blood is still in the streets. Well, the South Florida streets anyway. In case you’ve been distracted by the [...] Read more »

I’m Not a Racist But…

Ty Cobb was a great baseball player but not a very nice person.  Actually, he wasn’t a very nice baseball player either, regularly trying to hurt the competition.  The thing about Cobb, though, is that he never pretended to care about other people.  Love him or hate him, you could never say that he was [...] Read more »

The Rules: Yu Darvish Pun Edition

With the Japaranian sensation Yu Darvish making his Big League career official by signing with the Texas Rangers, I thought it appropriate to lay down some ground rules for the inevitable onslaught of awful puns that are certain to tattoo newspapers and interwebs around the world. *Note: All italicized examples come from Lone Star Ball’s [...] Read more »

Setting the Mahmud

RSBS Special Correspondent and Dark Horse Republican Candidate, Mr. Johanna Mahmud reports: Rool: [to the tavern cat ) You are so beautiful! Your eyes! Your whiskers! I have to kiss you! My behavioral standards have long kept me from attending the Cub’s Convention. Sorry. Sometimes you gotta rob a cop, pee on Ronny Woo Woo [...] Read more »

The Championship That Keeps On Giving

On Sunday I finished the Houston Marathon in 3 hours, 15 minutes and 19 seconds — a new personal best. And though it’s been more than 48 hours since I finished the race, not a minute has gone by where I haven’t found complete satisfaction in having accomplished the task. In fact, I don’t think [...] Read more »

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